Have you ever read something and been spooked by how accurately it reflects you or your life.
Well, this is a feeling many TikTok users have recently experienced thanks to Tristan Collazo.
Tristan, who posts under the username, @risethriverepeat, is a licensed resident in counselling and has a masters degree in Mental Health Counselling.
In his videos on the social media platform, he discusses all sorts of topics relating to psychology from social anxiety to narcissism.
He’s recently captured a lot of attention with his series about Adler’s birth theory and how the order in which you were born in your family can have an impact on your personality and how you interact with your siblings.
The first video in the series, all about oldest siblings, has so far been watched eight million times.
He begins by explaining how the oldest children tend to be more responsible and helpful, but are often perfectionists.
“This concept states that a person’s birth order plays a major role in how an individual’s personality is shaped,” he said.
“Families place unrealistic expectations on the eldest child and because they are no longer the only child, they must adapt and change, in turn, they become perfectionists, people-pleasers and authoritative, yet extremely helpful.
“They learn to bear most of the responsibility.”
Meanwhile, second children start off life knowing that they have to share the attention of their parents, which brings out their competitive side.
“Their older siblings serve as a role model but also spark a competitive fire as they strive to catch up and surpass their older sibling. In turn, they may be more likely to be better adjusted in life, they are more competitive, peacemakers, people-pleasers, rebellious and always gaining new abilities.”
Tristan goes on to say that when a sibling goes on to become a middle child, it can cause resentment and frustration.
“It’s not easy to please parents as much when you’re sandwiched between the oldest and the youngest,” he explained.
“Middle children in smaller families appear more frustrated, while those in bigger families may be more cooperative to get their needs met.
“They can feel like life is unfair, feeling unloved and impatient, but they can also be even-tempered, adaptable and able to compromise.”
And then finally there’s the youngest sibling – who doesn’t have to compete with the others as they’re simply “the baby” of the family.
“The youngest child does not have the disadvantage of having to compete with a new sibling,” says Tristan. “They are considered the babies since their siblings have likely become independent.
“The youngest may receive more attention, the youngest may be outgoing and attention-seeking, feel inferior to their other siblings, hyper-dependant on others, more competitive to catch up with their siblings developmental level and may behave as if they’re the only child. Can you relate?”
Thousands of people could relate to the concept, with many taking to the comments of the TikTok videos to share their thoughts.
One person said: “I’m the oldest of three and a little creeped out because of how accurate this is.”
Another wrote: “Scary how accurate this is!”
“I felt this deep in my heart, so true,” proclaimed a third.
Someone else added: “I am second born and middle child, I completely understand this.”